Friday, November 13, 2009

Jealous? Uh Oh!

By Benedict Perez

As a negative facet in relationships, jealousy is a form of insecurity which becomes emotionally injurious to marriages mostly when they become too hot to handle. Feelings and emotions due to jealousy usually arise from one-sided apprehensions of danger and doubt about certain parts of life. And obviously it is about that uneasy feeling that one might not be loved adequately by the other.

Stated more clearly, the green eye effect is normally based from implausible reasons or dubious points. A classic example of this is the fear of being left by the other spouse for another woman. Due to this mental trepidation, the fearing spouse will be unnecessarily distraught with malicious thoughts and clouded with unpleasant ideas. And when these are spitefully articulated it initiates the launch of a barrage of questions and complaints anchored on suspicion and skepticism.

Very crucial in dealing with jealousy is not to deny the same. Rather, it is very important to embrace this feeling. Thus the first step is to accept this feeling as something normal and something that can be done away with n time. It will not be very healthy if feelings like that are repressed within oneself. It will do good if these feelings are being recognized in its entirety but to control them in such a way as not to cause unnecessary arguments.

After that, a process of introspection should be undertaken by asking oneself what are these things that is causing too much doubt and suspension. Try to decipher within oneself, search for answers within oneself as to the reasons why feelings of insecurity crop up. Often this particular dilemma deals with questions of love, of self worth, and of personal confidence.

And figure out whether these fears and anxieties are based on good grounds or valid reasons. It is vital at this juncture to determine if these insecurity-induced emotional struggles are caused by real sources. And if that is the case, then deal with them boldly. If the cause is in fact your spouse, then it is advisable to discuss the matter with him or her in an ambience of peace and open mindedness. In any event, there are sure fire amicable ways to settle things in order to finally put an end to jealousy and go on living healthy as well as anxiety free lives. - 16890

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